It seems odd when I think about not doing things I want to do. I mean why would someone not do what they like to do. Yet I find myself not following through with the things I say I want to do in life.
My contract with myself, my list of personal responsibilities, is helping me to look at what I am doing every day. I have only been doing it for 4 days and know it will take some time to really have some good, solid data about how I spend my time. So far, I have seen that I do not do all the things I think I do, and I could do more with each day if I planned my time better. Yet I have also been able to see that I am productive and do want to feel good with myself at the end of each day.
Apparently, I have had the desire inside of me all along yet I have been too busy being hurt and upset to notice. Although I am upset with myself for not being willing accept and deal with the sadness and anger before now, I am thrilled that I can now see that I do want; yes just want.
Time will show where I go with this. I will keep you updated on the path this takes me on. :)
well miss jules i hope you want something worthwhile and i also think you should want things for yourself a bit more often! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for your thoughtful comments.
DeleteI am trying to see that real internal happiness comes from doing what makes me happy.