"And since your history of silence
Won’t do you any good,
Did you think it would?"
Brave by Sara Bareilles
Yeah unfortunately I thought silence would do me good. I practiced silence since I was at least 8. Not literally silent but I never talked about anything real with anyone. Seriously no one about anything real. I was really good at being social and popular but if I look back at my life and my friends and family, I swear I do not remember being open or honest with anyone.
All this has done is make me very suspicious of other people and their motives. Being superficial, which is what I have practiced by not being real, has made me think that others are not presenting themselves honestly.
I want to take people at face value which means I am going to need to put myself out there at face value, really my face, not what I usually do which is to show a mask. I am a little nervous about doing so but I am going to do it.